Basic Instinct 2
No, of course I didn't pay $9.00 to go see this abortion in a theater. The film ran for a total of 3 weeks and recouped about $6 million of its estimated $70 million production costs, which must have been a terrible disappointment to Katie Kouric and Diane Sawyer and the countless other TV and print infobimbos who spent weeks ahead of the film's release crowing about how terrific it was that there was finally a movie about a middle-aged woman who was just as much of a murderous slut as any 23-year-old. (Of course, the film also grossed an additional $35 million in foreign markets, which means that overall it was only about $29 million down the tank...) Meanwhile, knowing that it would only be a matter of a few weeks before the film went to DVD, I bided my time, and recently went to my local video store and rented the DVD, thus saving myself a good 10 bucks (when you count in the popcorn).
Sure enough, just as I suspected, the basic (no pun intended) problem with this film was that it targeted the wrong audience. 14 years ago, millions of 25-to-45-year-old guys flocked to see the original Basic Instinct, and they were all going for the same reason: to fantasize about banging Sharon Stone. But that's not who showed up to see this movie.
This movie, to the extent that it gets rented on DVD at all, will be seen mainly by two audience segments: middle-aged women and gay men. And both groups will be watching it for the same reason: to fantasize about being Sharon Stone. Unfortunately for the producers of this film (and Stone herself), a 45-ish Sharon Stone is really not all that attractive to the kind of handsome, studly young guys that middle-aged women and gay men fantasize about being attractive to, and that audience segment, predictably, largely ignored this movie.
Sharon Stone, who, by her own account, screamed her head off at director Paul Verhoeven when she saw the rushes of the crotch scene in the first movie, spent the better part of ten years practically begging to get this movie made, by any means available, in an effort to revive her completely flaccid career.
But this film was not written by Joe Eszterhas. This film was not directed by Paul Verhoeven. The music for this film was not composed by Jerry Goldsmith. And, perhaps most importantly, this film did not co-star Michael Douglas.
Ironically, a 60-ish Michael Douglas is exactly the kind of guy that millions of men in their 50s and 60s today would be perfectly happy to trade places with. And a nasty, slutty 45-ish Sharon Stone is exactly the kind of woman that millions of those guys would have no trouble at all fantasizing about banging and tossing. But that's not the audience this movie was made for.
If this movie had co-starred Michael Douglas (or a reasonably age-appropriate stand-in), and if he had spent the entire movie wildly banging her, and if he had been the one fucking with her head for a change, and if the last scene of the film had shown him with a satisfied look on his face as he watched her crazed, shrieking, murderous, psycho-bitch ass being hauled off to Death Row, then this film probably could have been almost as big a hit as the original. As it is, this film will probably be about as big a hit as, say, "Crash".
But, hey, who knows, that's exactly the kind of film that gets Oscars these days...ones that almost nobody besides middle-aged women and gay men want to see. So maybe Sharon Stone will end up with an Oscar for symbolic reasons. And maybe she'll end up reviving her career, sort of. After all, this is Hollywierd we're talking about...
No, of course I didn't pay $9.00 to go see this abortion in a theater. The film ran for a total of 3 weeks and recouped about $6 million of its estimated $70 million production costs, which must have been a terrible disappointment to Katie Kouric and Diane Sawyer and the countless other TV and print infobimbos who spent weeks ahead of the film's release crowing about how terrific it was that there was finally a movie about a middle-aged woman who was just as much of a murderous slut as any 23-year-old. (Of course, the film also grossed an additional $35 million in foreign markets, which means that overall it was only about $29 million down the tank...) Meanwhile, knowing that it would only be a matter of a few weeks before the film went to DVD, I bided my time, and recently went to my local video store and rented the DVD, thus saving myself a good 10 bucks (when you count in the popcorn).
Sure enough, just as I suspected, the basic (no pun intended) problem with this film was that it targeted the wrong audience. 14 years ago, millions of 25-to-45-year-old guys flocked to see the original Basic Instinct, and they were all going for the same reason: to fantasize about banging Sharon Stone. But that's not who showed up to see this movie.
This movie, to the extent that it gets rented on DVD at all, will be seen mainly by two audience segments: middle-aged women and gay men. And both groups will be watching it for the same reason: to fantasize about being Sharon Stone. Unfortunately for the producers of this film (and Stone herself), a 45-ish Sharon Stone is really not all that attractive to the kind of handsome, studly young guys that middle-aged women and gay men fantasize about being attractive to, and that audience segment, predictably, largely ignored this movie.
Sharon Stone, who, by her own account, screamed her head off at director Paul Verhoeven when she saw the rushes of the crotch scene in the first movie, spent the better part of ten years practically begging to get this movie made, by any means available, in an effort to revive her completely flaccid career.
But this film was not written by Joe Eszterhas. This film was not directed by Paul Verhoeven. The music for this film was not composed by Jerry Goldsmith. And, perhaps most importantly, this film did not co-star Michael Douglas.
Ironically, a 60-ish Michael Douglas is exactly the kind of guy that millions of men in their 50s and 60s today would be perfectly happy to trade places with. And a nasty, slutty 45-ish Sharon Stone is exactly the kind of woman that millions of those guys would have no trouble at all fantasizing about banging and tossing. But that's not the audience this movie was made for.
If this movie had co-starred Michael Douglas (or a reasonably age-appropriate stand-in), and if he had spent the entire movie wildly banging her, and if he had been the one fucking with her head for a change, and if the last scene of the film had shown him with a satisfied look on his face as he watched her crazed, shrieking, murderous, psycho-bitch ass being hauled off to Death Row, then this film probably could have been almost as big a hit as the original. As it is, this film will probably be about as big a hit as, say, "Crash".
But, hey, who knows, that's exactly the kind of film that gets Oscars these days...ones that almost nobody besides middle-aged women and gay men want to see. So maybe Sharon Stone will end up with an Oscar for symbolic reasons. And maybe she'll end up reviving her career, sort of. After all, this is Hollywierd we're talking about...
posted by dataguy at 8:57 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home